You can’t give what you don’t have

- Years ago, I took a self-assessment that made me aware of a blind spot. I didn't take care of myself. My typical pattern was go, go, go until I collapsed from exhaustion, took time to recover, then repeated that pattern over and over. Have you experienced that? My performance coach gave me a stern warning that if I didn't change, I was going to burn out. Practically speaking, I needed to boost connection in my life and boost resilience practices. This go-until-you-drop habit is an easy trap to fall into. For me, it made it difficult to be present and connect with others. If this describes you, you may have an addiction that's tied to dopamine, a type of neurotransmitter in your brain. To learn more about this, download the Addicted to Your Smartphone to-do list or Busyness handout in the exercise files folder. Here's the bottom line, you can't give what you don't have. Each of us needs connection in our own life in order to connect well with others. If you work in a culture that's disconnecting, one of the most important initial actions you can take is to find like-minded people who value connection and will support and encourage each other. We also need to take care of ourselves by attending to resilience practices. Here are several practices that will help you cope with the stress that comes from living a full life. Connect, spend time connecting with family, friends, and coworkers. Volunteer in your community. This is especially important for remote workers because they don't benefit from connecting with colleagues in person at work. Stay active. Exercise will energize you and help reset and calm your nervous system. Rest, aim for seven to eight hours of sleep each night. Taking a short nap has been shown to help you if you're low on sleep. Build in time to be quiet, whether that's in prayer or meditation, reading for pleasure or listening to music. Commit to taking at least one day off from work each week to do things that rejuvenate you. Avoid multitasking. Try to focus on one task at a time. Get out in nature. Organize your physical environment, including your workspace. Research shows that clutter can make us feel overwhelmed. Replace negative behaviors with neutral or healthy behaviors. For example, if you're reaching for sugar or refined carbohydrates to get an energy boost in the afternoon, replace them with fruit or vegetables that will not trigger a sugar crash. Resilience practices help give us energy and good health so that we have the capacity to connect with others. Absent the energy and good health needed to connect, we're more likely to slip into attitudes, language, and behaviors that are disconnecting, especially if we have higher levels of stress in our lives. Which of the resilience practices that I mentioned can you focus on in the coming week?